More lessons from Maya.

 Today spending time with Maya I clearly heard another lesson from her. It was that she had been waiting for me to accept her and love her unconditionally, just like her mother had. How often do we allow ourselves to give up wanting, we are always wanting to change things. When we can live in the present and allow ourselves to ‘feel’ with the sensations in our body and the intuition we bury, with the heart that our animals want to connect with Joy is our more frequent companion. Our horses are so much more evolved in some aspects than we are.

scratching again.

Maya has taught me the way in to a close relationship with her is to simply feel the joy of unconditional love with her that she shared with her mother. The moments of intimacy grooming, scratching those itches and being close have been important to her. There was a time when she couldn’t bear to work up close to me, her whole body would become tense, brushing even caused tension. These intimate moments have created a feeling of closeness that she now seeks and we both enjoy. How could I ever have thought of riding her without these lessons she has given me.


The pauses, time spent simply enjoying each others presence, feeling an energetic connection have been the things that have created a relationship where she now says yes, she is a horse who wants to be heard and if she has an opinion she will show it, sometimes we negotiate still but it is always done with unconditional love. Just like the love I have for my children, when they were growing up sometimes they had to know a certain behavior was not acceptable, they always knew and still do that I love them unconditionally.

As Humans we often feel superior to animals, this makes us deaf to the messages they have to share and the lessons we can learn. We think we know best and even with the best intentions sometimes we forget to honor the spirit and being inside the beautiful creature that we see and want to be close to. Finding and acknowledging that soul of our horse or any other creature, without the other emotions that cloud us is the key to finding the joy of unconditional love both given and received in return. The emotions of fear, jealousy, anger and even lack of self worth along with any other negative emotions are what hold us back, these are the things our horses would like to help dissolve in us, so the unconditional love they have to share can come forth. This is part of their message for us. This is how they wish to be of service to us. They can raise us up to be so much more than we are, when we are ready to listen and learn.

Seeking companionship.

Horses seek companionship, humans enjoy the company of horses, I don’t claim to have studied the science behind this very much, however I know from how it feels for me that horses are good for me, mentally, spiritually and physically.

maya and me

When I am with my horses I am calm, I feel a sense of peace and well being. I tune into them and their world. The deeper our connections become the more I feel, hear and communicate with them in their world with their silent language.


We share time together because it feels good, we feel a bond and connection that is a two way shared energy. We don’t need to analyse what we are doing or over think things, we just let it flow.  Horses know more about us than we know ourselves, they feel our emotions and energy. They know if we are aware and present, to feel the benefits of a deep connection with our horse takes time, sometimes you will feel it other days maybe not, they are always ready to offer this, the self realisation they can bring to us has to be welcomed to be of benefit. I am in awe of how lucky we are as a species on this planet to have the horse in our lives, in awe of how they continue to offer us these connections even when we are not ready to fully appreciate and experience them. They just keep offering and waiting for us to wake up and tune in.

This deeper level of connection is something I had at one point, no awareness of, the horses I share this with are willing to share this message with others as well. When I meet new horses often they connect with me easily, and seem to know that I can feel this they already feel the lines of silent communication are open and that I come with love in my heart. Not always, they all have their own personality and experience of us humans. They seem to know when they offer me connection I am ready to embrace it and I thank them for it. When I meet a horse less willing to share this experience I will endeavor to show them who I am and that I would love to see their true nature, I am always receptive to what they have to show me. Through the study of the horse and with guidance from Carolyn Resnick in The Waterhole Rituals I have been lucky to discover my true nature. To enjoy the companionship horses offer.

Finding the way to connection.

I was recently lucky to finally after many years of meaning to do it, get round to learning from Jenny Rolfe. I had thought about doing it, but never actually did.

I do believe there is a right time and place for everything. Possibly I was still following other paths, maybe my own journey of self realisation was not at the point where I could meet Jenny as the person I was meant to be when we met. I feel sure she has assisted many others on their own similar journey . However I was on a different route to that point.  We were meant to meet at the exact point that we did. I was better prepared to fully absorb all I could. We met as two beings knowing who they are and knowing also how much common ground and love of horses we shared. I had instant respect for Jenny, how down to earth and grateful she is, how not driven by ego and humble, very rare qualities in someone with her experience and connections in the horse world. There are many different routes towards connection with our horse and ourselves. I truly believe to fully experience true heartfelt connection with a horse, human or indeed our self we need to nurture these qualities.

I went open without judgement ready to learn and be the student. Why would I go in any other way? Sometimes we have strong beliefs and we are not ready to see that a ‘different’ way, may  be worthy of exploring when we are ready.

Finding the way to connection.

To find the way into connection with a horse can take many different paths there may be as many subtle differences as there are horses and humans. To learn different ways to connection from experienced teachers with shared ideals is always worth pursuing.

When I watched how Jenny connected with her horses I was absorbed in the moment,  I very much enjoyed experiencing how the connection was growing and to have the chance to try to ‘put it into practice’ Horses are amazing teachers Red and Habil showed how they felt unafraid to show their spirit just like Noons , Maya and Tarky they are not ‘programmed’ to perform. I had to earn the special moments they offered and speak their language. This is when horses show us who we are.

After watching Jenny work with Red she put him away, Habil was just along the yard in his stable, I approached, he told me very clearly, ” I don’t want you here” I respected his wishes and retreated. Jenny gave them some hay and went to get him out. It turned out he had an opinion about Red working first!! Once in the arena I could see him change and he was very focused on Jenny.

Then it was my turn to try out my new found ways of communicating with him. My initial meeting with Habil made it feel all the more special when I felt a real affinity with him. He most likely appreciated my quick response to him telling me to ‘get lost’ and also the fact that I did not take it personally when I was with him all I was thinking about was how lovely it would be to build a connection with him trying to use what Jenny had shown me, also how amazing he is. We humans can get so offended when our horse is merely communicating.

Habil all smiles.

The information I would like to share in this blog is simple, follow a path that draws you in, if you are searching for connection with your horse follow the path that suits you both, things will come at the right time when you are ready. Beware of treading a new path before you have explored the one you are on to the point where you can remain open to new ideas and blend them with your present ones. Remain Grateful, Humble, Listen and like Jenny and myself when we met SMILE OFTEN. Don’t be afraid to feel the joy of the moment. Thank you, Jenny, Barrie, Red and Habil.



Creating the dance with our horse.

P1160520Any dance has to flow to be beautiful, how do we encourage the flow of the dance with our horse.

 I like to think of dancing with my horse.  For us it allows  expression and creativity.

Any dance even if its one we have danced before,  will never be the same twice, the great joy of not knowing keeps us alive to the music. It keeps us alive to the moment. Great dance partners trust each other and have an affinity for one another.

Even if the dance has been rehearsed many times it can never be the same twice. A great dance partnership Margot Fonteyn and Rudolf Nureyev. Trust and an affinity, creating beauty.

Margot Fontane and Rudolf N

From the Guardian newspaper.

At the orchestra rehearsals the conductor prepares his or her interpretation, but with the great conductors “the performance” only happens at the concert, and it can be different every night. There are many factors that influence how conductors see a piece of music each time they perform it, and their role is to create the performance anew every time.

I once heard a player complain to Bernstein after a performance because he had done something differently from the way that he had rehearsed it. Bernstein asked the player if he wanted an automaton or a musician. Any player who has worked with great conductors knows that what they bring to their performances is the difference between competence and inspiration. It diminishes and completely misunderstands great music-making not to think there is any difference between the two.


I find my horse an inspiration I hope we inspire each other. She is not an automaton as Bernstein put it, I would rather think of her as a musician able to express herself and her extraordinary talents. This is possible because we share a connection, a bond and an affinity. Its the relationship we share that allows for her to choose me as her conductor, so that like the conductor of the orchestra she can inspire me and I can guide her,  It is up to me to be the person who she chooses and trusts. Without putting aside the want for performance, instead enjoying the evolution of the dance together, we would not have the partnership we do.

The performance arises from the affinity we share . An affinity that would not have the magic without The Waterhole Rituals.

I truly believe that when our focus is on our horses well being and our relationship not the performance, that is when a great performance emerges. It springs forth from the joy of being together, moving together and allowing for creativity together.

“You are perfect, just as you are.”

The first Waterhole Ritual of Sharing Territory starts the evolution that occurs when we embrace a new way to ‘be’. Not only does it change our perspective, it changes our horses too. We share a oneness in the quiet, our breath slows, we have a wave of gratitude for our horses. We see our horses as, Perfect just the way they are, we feel no need to change them and they seek us out as they know we feel this.

How often I hear people express that they would like to change the way they are, or change the way people around them are. Change their horse.

It feels unpleasant when you know someone is not happy for you to just simply be you. Our horses encounter this all too often so tell your horse, in the quiet moments of connection. ” You are perfect” He may say the same to you.

Our horses can see our full potential.



Recently April came to spend the day here with my horses. Noonoo is a great teacher, first showing us to become more present and slow up. Then many lessons for April the biggest one for me was focus on me 100% if you want my attention.

Maya, after a tea break, was the one waiting with the biggest lesson of all, we shared territory and spoke  again about finding ways to become more present and more aware. We tuned into the sounds of nature, the birds and the breeze.

Maya came over and spent a long time very calmly sniffing our feet. We turned our hands over and could both feel a tingling in our palms, we could feel Maya’s energy. Her lesson for April was that she had forgotten her full potential in how well she can use energy and ‘feel’, I took the whip away and asked her to dance with Maya using her energy. She discovered she could move her away, draw her, change her direction, with very little effort and using her energy.  Here she asks her to move back.

Maya could see April was working too hard, doing too much and not tapping into her full potential, she gifted her with a beautiful lesson. April remembered to use all the gifts she already has.

Peeling back the layers.

I have just spent an amazing weekend with Linda Salinas this was the 5th clinic we have had together. I was very fortunate to spend time before the clinic again with Linda and my horses. Linda has opened my eyes to many things.


When you get to know someone really well, you have a friendship which includes the things we look to build with our horses. A bond, trust, respect, willingness and focus. These bring about the magnetic connection we feel with our horses. Is this why we are drawn to some people more than others? Maybe our inner guidance kicks in and draws us to those we feel this connection with. Those we can build bonds with those we trust.

I have seen many people and horses attending these clinics, they attract the nicest people and as the three days unfold the thing I have loved to witness is the peeling back of the layers some of us put up, the false person on the outside fades and our true nature appears. As this happens we are more drawn to those who let these false layers dissolve. We become someone who can share the love of life as well as the love of horses . It is our true nature to love, with all the hate being displayed in the world, the terror attack’s and killings it is refreshing to see the message from the horses, peel back the false layers let the true self out and it will be love. My three words at the end of the clinic were I love you. I can say this, and feel this, as I am free to do so, I have peeled back those layers and can just be who I am. There is no need for me to share again what a fantastic clinic Linda delivered as many others will. If you feel drawn to come , you will follow your heart. I followed mine and it lead me to Carolyn Resnick which in turn lead me to Linda I would highly recommend it.

My horses are also in full expression of their true nature and can show me who they are and how they feel. At liberty with freedom to do so, and knowing I will not put up any  layers between us. Our horses see through this they see the reality.

P1160618.JPGMaya expression

The way in to our horse.

Finding the way in and the yes from our horse can be different for every partnership.



When building a relationship with our horse,sometimes we just need to look out for the requests we can make that will have our horse saying YES ! and then build on it. I believe we  need to form a bond, have mutual trust, mutual respect, willingness and focus. We need these things to create harmony in our relationship and in everything we do with our horses. If we can look for the yes and listen to the feedback from our horse we will create a happier partnership.

I was lucky to have a couple of great classical dressage lessons last weekend and to watch others riding as well. I was taught more self discipline and focus were needed on my part, true and fair. I wish to improve and learn so this will be my aim.  When the lessons ended they stopped at the very best moment and the right place, for both horses and humans.

Just like encouraging our horses willingness in this way, and finding that ‘way in’ to a better riding partnership, for me I look for this in the relationship with my horses too, Noo noo likes to be close, Maya likes more distance, by finding the way they like to work with me at liberty I find the YES in my horse, the more I can be focused, fair and progressive in everything the more yes’s I hope to get in everything.  I will work hard on myself to improve after my lessons, I will make requests to my lovely Noo noo sometimes she may think she would rather not comply but I will endeavor to be fair and make requests that she will say yes to, often I just need to have the belief that we can do something more. If I don’t believe we can I am pretty sure we won’t!

Two days of Connection and have a good old sing along.

I have just returned from Surrey and Kent and what a fantastic time, it was really joyful to see the relationships growing and connections becoming stronger. Thank you to all of you, who allowed me to share territory with you and your horses and made me feel so welcome.

Driving home into the setting sun the radio station I was listening to dropped out, I found Radio 2 and Tony Blackburn’s golden hour. My friends of a certain age, in uk might remember him. I was coming across Salisbury Plain with vast open fields around me and found myself, totally out of tune, singing as loud as you like to these words.

Yesterday has just departed, and tomorrow hasn’t started, all that really matters is right now, and you should live a lifetime in each minute, take the sweetness from within it.

This summed up my two days. I was smiling and singing and so happy to be witness to the growing connections being made. Come on ladies sing along!!!!


Alois Podhajsky


This weeks blog is inspired by part of a book.  My horses my teachers by Alois Podhajsky. Here is the part I wish to share.

How do we understand our companions? When riding and training my horses I was forever trying to put myself in the place of the animal and to think from his point of view, especially in order not to demand more than he could perform. Retrospectively I realise that the constant endeavour to understand the creatures entrusted to my care became the reason why, though I was their trainer, I feel as their pupil today. Although they had no faculty of speech, they taught me more than many humans did. Therefore I feel that I should relate my experiences with my horses for the benefit of future generations of horses andmaestosomercuriohalfpasstoright riders.

In 1939, Podhajsky became chief of the Academy of Classical Horsemanship, better known as the Spanish Riding School of Vienna, Austria. Founded in 1572, the school’s main focus was the training of Lipizzan horses in the art of Classical dressage. Podhajsky was director of the school throughout World War II and continued in the position until his retirement in 1965.


I find it interesting that back in 1967 when this book was written, masters like Podhajsky had a very different regard for their horses than many people have today. I continue to try and share through the Waterhole Rituals and Classical dressage their view that we should remain the student of the horse and our life with him/her should be life enhancing for us both.